Rachel’s tribute upon Erin’s passing
Editor’s note: This remembrance was a post to FaceBook on October 10, 2023
I was an 18-year-old dumpster fire in my first year of college when I met Erin (E Marie Wall). She was a real adult (31! - hard to believe she was younger than I am now), she had an established career, and I looked up to her as a musician.
But more than that, she was my friend, and there were times when she felt like my family.
Erin was a part of so many of my formative experiences. She supported me in my pursuit of a career in music, and she supported me when I decided to quit. She got me through the worst friend breakup I've ever experienced. She introduced me to red wine and Thai food (and the dangers of combining the two and then saying "I've never had a hangover or been sick from alcohol"... sorry Shannon...). She shared her Christmas with me one year - me, her sister, her parents and her then-boyfriend. She gave me a job after college watching her baby son, she let me live with her and travel with her and explore the world in a way I never would have been able to otherwise. I lived with her for a nearly a year, and we were friends for nearly 14 years.
There are so many memories that have been flooding through me today: running my first (and only) 5k with her and Baby M; buying dirndls and going to Oktoberfest in Munich; baking banana bread on a nearly weekly basis for the two months we were in Chicago around Michael's first birthday; bringing her ginger ale and watching Lost on her laptop in her bed while she was pregnant with Michael and having really bad morning sickness; driving with her from Chicago to Detroit for a gig and seeing a dead guy on the sidewalk immediately behind the "Welcome to Detroit" sign; both of us being there for Michael's first steps in Calgary; Erin in the lobby after my first recital, hugging me and telling me she was proud of me; laughing ourselves silly at Hyperbole and a Half blog posts; visiting with her in her hotel room in New York when our paths crossed there randomly in 2015, catching up until like 3 am; cat sitting for her when she was on short gigs and I needed time away from my dorm; her making me go to the dentist and the gyno and looking out for me when I was struggling to look out for myself, singing Baby Beluga on loop to get Michael to stop fussing. I could go on and on.
The years when Erin and I were close were some of the most difficult years of my life - there was a lot of change, a lot of emotional turmoil, a lot of self-discovery and personal growth that was necessary but painful. She never judged me for being a basket case (or never expressed it anyway), and she loved me even when I was a difficult person to love.
Erin helped me figure out who I was and what was important to me. And she gave me a soft place to land while I was working all of that out.
I feel so lucky to have had her as part of my life, and I know this world was better for having her in it. Her loss is tremendous, but I think her influence and the good that she did is even greater.
Rachel Patton - November 9, 2023